Gilmore girls Recap

So here's what I learned after watching Gilmore girls. And I don't mean after watching it back in the year 2000 and now I'm finally unveiling my observations. I mean I started watching it for the first time in 2014, long after everyone else had developed an attachment to it and bought all the DVDs and spent night after night with their reruns.

So here goes.

1. Emily Gilmore's mouth and manner of speaking kept feeling familiar. Who is she? Where have I seen her before? Then it hit me! She's the Pioneer Woman. I've seen 3 or 4 episodes of the Pioneer Woman cooking show on Netflix. It's the way her mouth turns slightly down when she speaks and some of the inflections in her voice. It's Emily Gilmore! Do you see it?

2. I'm intrigued by Lorelai Gilmore's relationship with Emily. I especially liked the episode where Lorelai muses that she may be making decisions based solely on the fact that her mother would disapprove. Does she really even like Pop Tarts, she wonders? Or does she just like them because they taste like freedom? She knows her mother would hate the idea of her eating a Pop Tart, therefore she loves the idea of it. I can think of a few friends who would majorly identify with this, but I have to say, I do not identify. I'm at ease around my mom, and best of all, I feel accepted. And it's only human nature I think that when you feel so accepted, you are more willing to accept back. So I don't feel as eager to point out her flaws or hold things against her. I just feel compelled to love her and interact with her. It feels easy. But that seems to be the tipping point with Emily and Lorelai––Lorelai senses disapproval from her mother. Almost all the frustrating interactions they have come down to that: Emily is disapproving, whether actively or passively. Ouch. And of course I'm usually (but not every time) taking the side of Lorelai because it's natural to expect more from the older person and expect them always to take the high road based solely on the fact that they are "the older person." I know that's kind of romanticizing things, but ah well. So it's easy to fault Emily Gilmore. She's "the older person" and often oozes a subtle tone of disapproval and it's a wedge between her and her daughter. At the same time we get to see Emily's humanity––how much she longs for Lorelai to visit and be part of her life. We see how hurt Emily is by some of the ways Lorelai expresses her need to be distanced from her own mother. Yet it never occurs to Emily that she's the one pushing Lorelai away. Of course it's all more complicated than that. But on the surface, it's like you're shouting at the TV saying, "What?! NO! Don't you see? You are pushing your daughter away!"

3. A funny moment is when Rory finally tells Lorelai something along the lines of "You know I'm figuring out that the less you tell grandma, the better." And Lorelai is all, "FINALLY YOU UNDERSTAND!" Because telling Emily Gilmore things is no easy matter. You pick and choose carefully what you share. You don't just freely offer up stuff! Because you know the dominoes that will quickly fall. So you find yourself telling as little as necessary. Lorelai doesn't even tell her mother when she gets engaged. Twice. The mother finds out from a third party and I admit I felt compassion toward Emily as I watched the hurt that followed.

4. Then there's Lane and her mother. Lane hides her music and all kinds of things from her mother. She tiptoes around her, yet she really does love her. But that love translates more to "I don't want to upset you." This show just has all kind of mother wounds!

5. It bothers me that the male/female relationships on the show seem incapable of lasting. The ancillary relationships last (Lane and Zach, Liz and T.J., and even Paris and what's his name!), but Lorelai can't settle down with a man and neither can Rory. They string us along and along and along and along and then BOOM, it's over. It bothers me! It was somewhat redeeming to see that, by the end, there was a probable future for Luke and Lorelai.

6. And finally there's Rory and her mother, which sometimes annoyed me, but most of the time is just a delight to watch. I think I was more annoyed early in the seasons when Rory is more of a child––I just got tired of feeling like Lorelai wasn't a mother, but simply Rory's BFF. And of course a friendship with your mother is a wonderful thing! I can't imagine life without my mom as my friend. But sometimes I want Lorelai to be a little more mature. Sometimes Rory seems more mature than her mother! But most of the time I love their interaction. And all of the time I'm thinking, "Rory Gilmore is annoyingly decent. And beautiful with her blue eyes and brown hair. Good grief. Then she's soft spoken (yet with just enough of an edge), smart, disciplined, kind, and never unraveled. I wish I had her voice so that when I got mad or yelled, I'd still sound sweet. UGH."

7. And lastly I had to wonder: Why doesn't Rory play an instrument? Or a sport?

I made a lot more observations while watching the show but I have forgotten them at the moment. I'm not sure if I'll be an avid re-watcher like other die hard Gilmore fans. But I was definitely glad I dove in and got to see what all the fuss was about!